Monday, March 10, 2008

The ladies love my 13 inches!!!

Straight Guy for David Archuleta reader Ed E. writes:

"I just celebrated two big anniversaries in my life.  The first is that I just turned 28 years old.  The second is that last Thursday marked one year that I have been living in my own apartment!  As a straight guy, it was always hard to convince the babes to come back to my place when my place was also my parents place, and my grandparents place. My mommy is a caregiver for the elderly, so when my pop pop and nanny grams couldn't take care of themselves, they moved into the guest bedroom.  While I was always looked at as being sensitive for staying so close to my family, I wasn't looked at as the straight guy sex machine that I always knew I was on the inside.  Ok, so now that I am on my own, I like to invite the ladies over to my place every night to watch tv.  When it comes to getting action, I don't think it should come as any surprise that I get the most action on American Idol nights.  Straight guys, here is a tip.  Tell the chicks you bring back to your place that you like David Archuleta, and that futon won't stay in couch position for long if you know what I am talking about.  That kid is booty gold.  I love David Archuleta and I am not ashamed to admit it!  Oh by the way, I am saving my money and I'm only a few months (maybe 9) away from being able to up my game by buying a second pair of designer jeans, a new belt buckle, and a flat screen TV to replace my current 13 incher.  No big deal though, because the chicks dig my 13 incher.  Yeah baby, do I make you horny?  Love Austin Powers!  Love David Archuleta!"

Um.  Mommy? 

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